Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Thursday Thirteen #39, 13 Resolutions I will never make


In the spirit of the new year, these are resolutions that I will never make...The following will never make it to my goal list and for a few, I have included reasons why.

1. I will enhance my facial features by sticking needles of botox in the wrinkles.
Life lines, I believe they should be called and Oil of Olay can work just fine.

2. This year I am going to train for the Boston Marathon.

3. I am going to cook supper every single night for my boys, since they deserve and appreciate homecooked meals including at least two vegetables.
Someday I swear I may just alternate pizza and cheeseburgers for two weeks to see if they would get sick of those choices.
4. I will not let those boys get my kitchen messy by learning how to cook, that's what girlfriends and marriages are for.
xmas cooking
After having two of them making cookies last week and not reading directions, I have decided that they need to spend more time in the kitchen. You know that extra bowl that you put the dry ingredients in for chocolate chip cookies, well I saw an egg in there...caught it in time.

5. I am going to learn how to skydive.
Sure, right after my stint on an Alaskan Crab fishing boat.....

6. I am not going to raise my voice ever again when speaking to my family, I will speak in a softly modulated voice at all times.

7. I will keep my opinions to myself.

8. I will have all my Christmas shopping done and wrapped by September.
And take away the element of surprise every December 12th that Christmas is only 2 weeks away???

9. I will never complain about the amount of snow in the winter or how hot iburied snowmant is.
Yeah, right, then what else would we have to talk about with strangers waiting in line at the store or at the bank. And this picture is what my lighted snowman looked like last week before we shoveled snow off the roof. That's right, shoveling snow off roofs, another fun NH activity....I think our Christmas lights will be taken down in April sometime when these 45 inches of snow melts.

10. I will not yell at the television, especially during sporting events.
My family keeps telling me that the players can't hear me, but I believe they can and do need to hear my instructions. After all, it was my clear instruction in last week's Patriot's game that led to the interception, I shocked the roomful of people when Ellis Hobbs made the catch. Now if I can only get my boys to listen to me like that.....

11. I resolve not to wait in line to vote, it's just a hassle finding a parking spot and then it's just eeny, meeny, meiny, moe to vote since all the candidates sound the same.
This upcoming primary is one of the most difficult voting decisions that I have ever had to make, I wish I could take the parts that I like and put them together for my ideal candidate.

12. I will never play another online game at POGO, since it's waste of my time.
Actually, I can think of worse addictions that include illegal substances or lots of calories.

13. I will blog at least six times a week.
Alas, time just got away from me with the holidays and I have been busy re-knitting the black ski hat, knitting/crocheting hats and scarves for nieces and girlfriends. There's also been some family time including some college kids making up words to try to beat me at UPWORDS. No, mertroll, vop and miili are not words.... I know, I have been MIA and will get on over to visit my regular blogging clan within the next few days.

Happy New Year all, leave a musing or your own non-resolution and I will try to get on over to comment. Peace to all in 2008!
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23 comments:

  1. Ha Ha Ha!!! You are a hoot!!! You made me smile!!!!

    Happy New Year!!!! :)

    Joie, Paix et bonheur!!!!

    (joy, peace and happiness) ;)

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  2. #9 looks like someone giving birth, LMAO!

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  3. Well then, those are some great resolutions NOT to take...lol. Thanks for stopping by and for the giggle. Happy TT.

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  4. Anonymous9:45 PM

    Great list! Those boys do look like they could use some help in the kitchen. Plus, girls love a guy who can cook.

    Re: #11, Are you just getting inundated by the candidates in NH this time of year? I totally agree that this is the most difficult decision, and the most important.

    I found your blog through Tips for New Bloggers' tutorial on three column templates. Good to meet you!

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  5. Anonymous9:58 PM

    Ha, what a great list! Happy New Year and TT!

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  6. Jenny's back! Jenny's back! Please promise me you will NEVER do #7.

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  7. 6 and 7 would be a fate worse than death for me! God bless you and your junior chefs.

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  8. So good to see you posting again. I feared something had happened to you on a Nordic ski trip to see son ski. Wish you could share some of that snow! We have had snow flurries 5 times and on Christmas day it snowed and stayed on the ground for about an hour and ten minutes. I want enough to shovel, make a snowman and take photos that are beautiful. Maybe soon. Last year we had snow for my birthday week and that is coming so . . . maybe soon!

    I am so glad to see you posting again! Next time you have such a long absence, please post a little note on top so we don't worry.(especially after writing that you want to see sun do his nordic racing but don't want to drive --you can't imagine the horror stories conjured up in my mind!)

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  9. My son and I cook together frequently.

    Sorry about the snow. There isn't any here along the California coast. :)

    Happy TT.

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  10. Your entry about not learning to sky dive makes me think of the commercial for the new movie with Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman called "The Bucket List". I love it when Morgan screams after he jumps out of the plane, "I hate your rotten guts!"

    It's fun to yell at the TV during sporting events isn't it? Even if they can't hear me (sometimes I wonder though), it's therapeutic.

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  11. I won't make any of those either. LOL!

    Happy TT!
    My Thursday Thirteen #6

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  12. Anonymous1:16 AM

    You are so right about the primaries and good for you for saying it.

    Hilarious list!

    13 Unresolved Issues from 2007

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  13. Boy did you make me laugh!! I love the one about homemade dinners with more veggies at dinner---wooo hooo! Not happenin' here either. Altho this will make you feel better: I asked my kids pediatrician about this because I was afraid if I didn't cook a homemade meal every night that they both would be scurvy or something. He said (yes HE!): do they eat 2 good meals a day? I said yes, a good breakfast, a good lunch, but dinner is a nightmare. He said to quit worrying. And since he went to med school and makes the big bucks (and told me what I wanted to hear) I'm not worrying about it!! One down, 1,567,498 more to go!
    Happy TT!

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  14. There's a snowman in there? I bigged it and I still couldn't make it out. That's a bunch of snow!

    How cool that your boys won't leave your house without knowing how to fend for themselves. How are they at laundry?

    Blogging at least twice a week would be wonderful, I've missed you.

    Happy New Year!!

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  15. jenn, Thanks for the great post and the laugh! I wouldn't make any of those either! :)

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  16. Welcome back - I was missing reading your blog. I have to admit I'm down to reading about 4 blogs and yours is one of them.

    I haven't felt like blogging much lately - I got caught up in all the festivities and one of my resolutions is to not blog at work. I've been so bad at that last year and I don't go on the computer much at home...so I'll probably only blog twice a week...hey maybe I'll have more to say if I post less...lol!

    Happy New Year!!

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  17. Anonymous3:23 PM

    Yay! A picture of charming young men, in the kitchen, no less! Another post to convince me that my sons will grow up and not beg me to wipe their bums! :)
    And, as much as I whine that our choices are made for us before we get a primary, I'm glad I'm not in Iowa or NH this month.

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  18. Anonymous4:49 PM

    Now that was a fabulous idea for TT! I wish I had thought of it. Thanks for stopping by!

    www.mamapj.com

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  19. you are funny I like the idea of the guys learning to cook My guys cook and their wives and girlfriends love it

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  20. Hahaha... these are hilarious!

    And I agree boys should definitely learn to cook.

    Happy New Year!

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  21. you are a woman, its your right to complain ;)

    Oh, I get it, you are not going to train for the marathon, you are just going to run it on skill alone

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  22. Anonymous9:44 AM

    That is too fun! I love that!

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  23. Anonymous8:08 PM

    Jen, these are funny! What a wonderful twisted mind you are. I haven't been visiting anyone much lately, and have sure missed seeing what you have to offer (course, it looks like you've been doing a little hiding, too! are you getting back into the swing of it?)

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Any thoughts or musings of your own to add?